Just because I'm crazy doesn't mean I'm wrong.

An Open Letter of Apology to My Friends

Dearest loved ones, Thanks for loving me even though... I am a drama queen I don't wear practical shoes I laugh REALLY loud...mostly at my own jokes I laugh inappropriately (like that time you tripped...I feel super bad about that) I snort when I laugh I obsess about dumb things (like finding the RIGHT shade of minty/pastel green nail polish) I make things about me that have nothing to do with me I "own too many jackets" You waved and honked as we drove past each other, but my music is loud and I was giving the performance of a [...]

Just Don't Call Me Late For Dinner

I'd like to give you a rundown of my nicknames. Scooter bear (as I didn't crawl, I scooted as a baby) Baby bear Jenny girl Igor (as a kid, when I was being obnoxious, this is what mother called me) Junior (if I was being a smart-mouth like my father) Jelly Gully Jenny-bunny Never-nude GB GG JenCo My nieces call me "Aunt G" which is the cutest thing evs My husband uses these frequently: Gus ("hurry up Gus!") Gilbert Jelly Wife Wife E. Wife Bubba Bootsy (I called HIM Bootsy, he turned it around and started calling me that. It's MADDENING!) [...]

An Open Letter to Restaurateurs

Dear Restaurateurs, I could use some clarification on a couple of items. "Hello, my name is (blank) and I'll be taking care of you this evening." Really? Who came up with this greeting? Just once, I'd like to ask what all this "care" entails. As someone who does not have children, I need a plan for who will care for me in my old age. Though I am certain that this is not what the server has in mind.  I see nothing wrong with "I'll be serving you this evening." "Sure, I can get you a refill. No problem." Well, [...]

Photo Shoot Lessons

I took a small step last weekend. As I prepare for auditions, I realized I needed headshots. (As if I don't have ENOUGH pictures of myself, right?!) I went to a WONDERFUL photographer (Nikki Rose) and we spent the afternoon walking through a park and taking pictures. Nikki made the experience fun. She immediately put me at ease & made me feel comfortable. My fav moments of the day were when one passerby said "Work it!" and when another said, "Those are the fanciest walkin' shoes I've EVER seen."  Now, here comes the part where I turn into a [...]

I Love You

I love people. I love being around people. I need you. You are my DRUG! I DON'T KNOW HOW TO QUIT YOU! Oh, dear. I took things too far...as I often do. 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7    4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. A couple [...]

This Is The Stuff

If you haven't heard Francesca Battistelli's song This Is The Stuff, go listen to it ASAP. It's one of my favs and always puts a smile on my face. This song is my inspiration for today's post. This is (some of) the stuff that drives me CRAZY. That stuff that I call "sawdust" which is in the bottom of the box of cereal. It is terrible. It makes you think there's enough for an entire bowl of cereal but not really. Sawdust. Bread heels. So gross. Who eats it? Dryer lint. We can put a man on the moon but we [...]

Becoming

I've got your basic good news/bad news situation for you today. Good news: ANYTHING is possible. Bad news: if you want your life to change, it is YOU who has to change. I am sorry. I wish it were simpler. I love this definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. Stop expecting things to happen when you keep doing the same crap over and over again. Ever felt "stuck"? Powerless to change your circumstances. Caught in the undertow of other people's decisions. You can't even put your finger on what's wrong, because [...]

Randomocity

Follow the rabbit trail of my thoughts today. These are things I remind myself of on a regular basis. Hope they help you, too! Be yourself. Scratch that, be BETTER than your normal self. If someone hurts you and you don't give them a chance to make things right, that is YOUR problem. Work it out! Don't hold onto things that weigh you down. Especially cake. Stop spending time with people who make you feel bad about yourself or don't push you to reach higher. Stop making stuff about you that literally has NOTHING to do with you. Make things about [...]

Lust & Found

Meet Kirstin. Kirstin is one of my very best friends. Kirstin was making her way downtown Portland via public transportation one day for work. As she disembarked, she left behind her makeup bag full of treasures. She text me that morning telling me what happened and that she was unable to contact Lost & Found that day and collect her belongings. This was unacceptable. I kicked into panic mode. I rushed over and brought her an emergency makeup kit that evening to get her through until she could retrieve her bag and told her I would contact Lost & [...]

Yogurt: Really?

What is the deal with yogurt these days? Are there commercials for anything else? Sure, I can't stop myself from singing "Activia!" once in a while. No, I don't want Jamie Lee Curtis's poopy yogurt. What is this Greek yogurt I keep seeing all these ridiculous ads for? You know what? I don't care. I am not interested. Ad world: I am the ultimate consumer and you managed to make me hate something I've never even tried. I won't even eat FROZEN yogurt! Ice cream impersonator! IMPOSTER! You will NEVER be DESSERT! Only I would rant about yogurt. That in itself [...]